When Healing Doesn’t Come

Rom 8:25 But if we have hope for that which we see not, then we will be able to go on waiting for it. (BBE)

As a former nurse, I have seen much suffering. As well my own sufferings (fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, arthritis, cancer, panic attacks), many of my loved ones also suffer. So the subject of healing is one that is near and dear to my heart.

While I love God and believe in His Word, there are a number of topics on which I am not quite clear, and healing is one of them. I have done extensive study on the subject and have put everything that I have learned into practice. I have watched Christian healing teaching videos over and over. I have read and re-read many books on the subject. I have rebuked symptoms and spoken healing scriptures over and over again. I have prayed in tongues and I have laid hands on the sick. I have believed for healing with everything that is within me.

So I must confess to some (ok – a lot) of bewilderment when healing does not manifest itself in either my own body or that of my loved ones.

When it came to the issue of my own healing – or NOT healing, as it were, I came to a place in my faith life wherein I had an important choice to make. I could either get angry and frustrated with God, which would damage my relationship with Him, or I could stop struggling and just accept what was (and is) and leave it in God’s hands. I confess that this is much harder for me to do when it is a dear loved one suffering – I feel so helpless.

My relationship with God is more important to me than my own healing, so I have chosen to try to be more aceepting and peaceful about my situation. I also try to remember a very wise statement my mother once made concerning her own struggle with suffering. She told me that she has chosen to believe that God’s Word is true so that when His Word says: “1Pe 2:24 He took our sins on himself, giving his body to be nailed on the tree, so that we, being dead to sin, might have a new life in righteousness, and by his wounds we have been made well.” (BBE) she believes that she is healed, even if it means that she won’t manifest it until Jesus comes again.

Rom 8:21 That all living things will be made free from the power of death and will have a part with the free children of God in glory.
Rom 8:22 For we are conscious that all living things are weeping and sorrowing in pain together till now.
Rom 8:23 And not only so, but we who have the first fruits of the Spirit, even we have sorrow in our minds, waiting for the time when we will take our place as sons, that is, the salvation of our bodies.

On my rough days, and when loved ones are suffering, I try to remind myself that the present suffering is nothing compared to the glory that awaits us in Heaven and that having patience and holding fast to faith is earning us great rewards and crowns of glory.

Rom 8:18 I am of the opinion that there is no comparison between the pain of this present time and the glory which we will see in the future. (BBE)

Rom 8:25 But if we have hope for that which we see not, then we will be able to go on waiting for it. (BBE)

Rev 2:10 Have no fear of the things which you will have to undergo:… Be true till death, and I will give you the crown of life. (BBE)

If you or a loved one are suffering and awaiting healing, I pray that God will fill you with faith, hope, comfort, and peace. I also pray for your healing and deliverance, in the name of Jesus.

Blessings

 

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Dazed and Confused

“I’m dazed and confused, hanging on be a thread
I’m being abused, I’d be better off dead
I can’t stand this teasing, I’m starting to crack
You’re out to get me, you’re on the right track”

The above lyrics are from a blues-rock song in 1967, written and performed by Jake Holmes. The rock group Led Zeppelin re-did the song on their 1969 debut album.

While I don’t feel that I would be “better off dead”, I must confess to feeling somewhat “dazed and confused” myself lately.

This week I developed inflammation in both of the sacroiliac joints in my lower back. This has caused a literal “pain in the a**”! I am hobbling around like an old lady and groaning like an arthritic hound dog. Hot and cold flashes are my companions as I alternate between ice packs and heating pads. Anti-inflammatories and muscles relaxants induce a definite couch potato demeanor. And my new fashion accessory is a supportive, magnetic back brace – which looks ever so elegant with my ankle socks and bathrobe!

This literal pain in the butt has caused me to miss: leading one ladies’ fellowship and participating in another, cancel my son and family’s visit (which was to be our Christmas visit), and give up a shift at work at a time when we really need the extra money!

This is on top of having to deal with increased fatigue, lethargy, depression and anxiety due to the change in seasons and my suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder.

AND THEN – my poor, sweet hubby has been suffering from a migraine for the past three days! He has used up his allotment of medication and can’t get a renewal for at least 2 weeks!

He has had so many migraines this year that he has used up all his sick days and vacation time so that when he has to take a sick day now, he is losing a day’s pay. This is not nice at any time of year but especially not at Christmas.

So – yes, I am feeling “dazed and confused, abused and hanging by a thread” at times.

When I am feeling like that, I turn to the only place and person that I know to turn to – my Heavenly Father. While I absolutely believe that He does not send me these trials, I confess to wondering why I have to keep going through them and why deliverance and healing do not seem to be forthcoming.

Like David in the Psalms, I pour out my questions, my fears and my frustrations to God.

“O Lord, all my longing is known to you; my sighing is not hidden from you. My heart throbs, my strength fails me; as for the light of my eyes—it also has gone from me.” ~Psalm 38:9-10 (NRSV).

Psa 69:1 To the Chief Musician. Concerning the Lilies. A Psalm of David. Save me, O God! for the waters have come in on my soul.
Psa 69:2 I sink in deep mire, where there is no standing; I have come into deep waters, where the floods overflow me.
Psa 69:3 I am weary from my crying; my throat is dried; my eyes fail while I wait for my God.

I beseech, entreat and implore Him to help us.

Psa 118:25 Save now, I beseech You, O Jehovah; O Jehovah, I beseech You,…

I remind Him of His promises.

2Co 1:20 For all the promises of God in Him are yes, and in Him Amen, to the glory of God by us. 

And then I purposefully take stock of all the blessings that I do have and I thank God for them. I also purposefully look to see little blessings in every day – like the handsome bluejay at the bird feeder yesterday and the cute red-breasted nuthatch today. Or the unusually mild temperatures we have been enjoying this November along with the mellow, golden sunlight.

Php 4:8 Finally, my brothers, whatever things are true, whatever things are honest, whatever things are right, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report; if there is any virtue and if there is any praise, think on these things.

I also try to be grateful for the peace and quiet that is my environment and be thankful that I don’t really have anyone making any pressing demands on my limited energies.

Php 4:7 And the peace of God which passes all understanding shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

In the end, the truth of it is that when the struggles of this life make me feel dazed and confused, there is only one place to which I can turn – Heaven, and only one person to whom I can turn – God – in the name of His son, Jesus Christ. Without them, where would there be any hope?

Psa 118:14 Jehovah is my strength and song, and He is my salvation.

2Th 2:16 Now may our Lord Jesus Christ Himself, and God, even our Father, who has loved us and has given us everlasting consolation and good hope through grace,
2Th 2:17 comfort your hearts and establish you in every good word and work…

Blessings

Burnt Cookies

I am having one of those days – burning, aching body, mind-numbing fatigue, frustration. And then I burn the cookies!!

I have to say that it wasn’t really my fault. We have an older stove with a very temperamental oven thermostat. I even used a separate thermometer and reduced the baking time – but still ended up with “rubbed bronze finish” cookies or “hardtack” as my hubby will call them. Not only is this frustrating from the time and effort perspective but we really can’t afford to waste any food.

On top of my already feeling rough today, the burnt cookies were almost the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back. But while I was indulging in a momentary pity party, I remembered the recent conversation I had with a pastor and his wife who were visiting from Zambia and I quickly realized that it is silly of me to “cry over spilled milk” or burnt cookies, as it were.

Pastor Daniel was filled with passion and joy as he shared the work that has been going on in his area of Zambia. As he told his story, I learned what life is like for most of the villagers that he works with. They do not have electricity and any cooking that is done, is done outside over a fire.  A lot of the food they have must be grown, cultivated and processed all by hand using crude hand tools. He shared a video of women threshing maize for the kernels and then pounding the kernels into flour, both back-breaking, mind-numbing chores.

These village women have good reason to complain about pain, fatigue and frustration, yet they rarely complain, rather, they are grateful for the ability to be able to feed their family anything at all. And I bet that they would even be grateful for burnt cookies!

I admire these women who make the best of what their life has to offer. I admire how thankful they are for any little blessing that comes along.

So, when I am having a “burnt cookie” day, I will remember these women and think about how blessed I am to have shelter, protection, warmth, an income, electricity, indoor plumbing with hot and cold running water, a loving husband, freedom, peace, food including ingredients to make cookies and yes – even an electric oven that burns cookies!

When you are having a “burnt cookie day” look for and focus on the blessings you have instead.

Selah