There’s Something in My Eye

In November, I wrote a post entitled “Ma Ee” in which I described how I have had some issues with my eyesight in the past.

In the last two months, I have once again been dealing with problems with my right eye. It started one evening when I suddenly lost most of the vision in the center of my eye and what I could see around the perimeter was like looking through jagged shards of glass.

The hubby, thinking I may be having a stroke, whisked me off the the hospital. The doctor gave me a pill to lower my blood pressure (which is usually VERY low) and after a brief examination of my eye, he told me that he thought that I had a detached retina. FYI – The retina is the light-sensitive layer of tissue that lines the inside of the eye and sends visual messages through the optic nerve to the brain. When the retina detaches, it is lifted or pulled from its normal position. If not promptly treated, retinal detachment can cause permanent vision loss. So – not a good thing.

I was told that I would probably have to have emergency eye surgery first thing the following morning. My hubby had to take the day off work and we made the early morning  1 1/2 hour drive down to the city.

It turned out that I did not have a detached retina (thank God)! The specialist thought that what I had experienced was an ocular migraine which didn’t require any treatment.

Two days later, my eye was red, swollen and aching. It felt exactly like it did the last time I had iritis (inflammation of the iris). I popped into the optometrist’s office to see if I could be seen that day or the next. No – they were too busy. I was advised to go to the Emergency Department. I asked if Emerg doctors could prescribe eye drops and was told “Oh yes”.

So off I went to the hospital to go through the whole rigamarole again. The doctor wanted to give me an injection for a migraine. I refused as I knew that I wasn’t having a migraine. Then after an hour of crazy questions he finally told me that I probably had iritis (big surprise) BUT – (wait for it) HE COULDN’T PRESCRIBE THE STEROID DROPS I NEEDED TO TREAT THE PROBLEM! He advised me to try to see the specialist again the following day – although the receptionist thought that the specialist was gone for the long weekend.

I called the optometrist’s office the following day, explained the issue and asked if I could please be seen on the following Tuesday after the long weekend. The receptionist told me that I shouldn’t wait that long and that I could be seen that very afternoon. (Remember – I had been told the previous day that there was NO WAY I could be seen before Tuesday – thus the futile Emergency visit).

So I was finally checked, diagnosed with iritis and prescribed not just one, but three separate medications. The receptionist told me that she was faxing the prescriptions to my pharmacy in a few minutes. I slowly walked around the town and to the pharmacy only to be told that they had not received any faxed prescription.

I called the pharmacy again that evening but they still had not received any fax. By then, the optometrist’s office was closed for the long weekend!

I was unable to get the medication until Tuesday and even then when I went in to pick them up I was told that one of them was no longer being made! I would have to wait until they could reach the optometrist for an alternative. AARGH!

The inflammation in my eye took quite a while to dissipate and while it has finally gone, I have been left with an eye whose vision is like looking through fog filled with millions of tiny particles of soot. This is accompanied by larger black spots on the periphery of my vision – I feel like I have a small swarm of fruit flies constantly buzzing back and forth. And just to make things interesting, there is a long, squiggly, wire-like, black “worm” floater right in the center of my vision.

Yesterday marked the fourth visit to the eye specialist and the news I received made me feel like having a bit of a pity party. Apparently, not only do I have scar tissue on my cornea (from previous infections) which has given me an atypical astigmatism (why can’t I be “typical” for once??), I also have a cataract forming on the lens (thus the fogginess) along with the floating “worm” and “fruit flies”!

We discussed the possibility of having cataract surgery but the specialist felt that due to the high incidence of inflammation in that eye, surgery may actually cause a severe flare up. And as for those annoying floaters – apparently they are permanent!

So to recap – 2 Emergency visits, 4 eye specialist visits, and 2 optometrist visits and I have scar tissue, a damaged iris, a cataract, and floaters. I don’t think that there is any more room in my eye for anything else!

But sometimes, I think that I may have something way more serious than fog and floaters in my eye; something that does not blind my actual vision but which may blind my spiritual one.

The Bible describes it as a “beam”.

Mat 7:3 And why do you look on the splinter that is in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the beam that is in your own eye? 

I know that I can be guilty of judging and criticizing others. I may be doing that at the risk of being hypocritical.

Oh, but isn’t it so much easier to notice the flaws in others than it is to see our own?

The Bible tells us that we must first look at ourselves and remove the offending/offensive parts from ourselves before we look to pointing out how to fix other people’s faults.

Mat 7:5 Hypocrite! First cast the beam out of your own eye, and then you shall see clearly to cast the splinter out of your brother’s eye.

While I pray for the vision to be restored in my right eye, more so I pray that God will help me see the times where there is a “beam” stuck in my spiritual eye.

As for you my readers – “Here’s mud in your eye”. 🙂

Joh 9:6 And when He had spoken these things, He spat on the ground and made clay from the spittle. And He anointed the eyes of the blind man with the clay.

Joh 9:11 He answered and said, A man called Jesus made clay and anointed my eyes and said to me, Go to the pool of Siloam and wash. And going and washing, I received sight.

Blessings

 

 

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“Ma Ee”

When I was a young nurse working in a nursing home, I had an elderly Scottish gentleman for a patient. One shift he became somewhat agitated and when I asked him what was wrong he said, “It’s ‘ma ee’; there is something wrong with ‘ma ee'”. I was not used to a thick Scottish accent and so I thought that he was telling me that there was something wrong with his ear. He got frustrated with me and finally pointed to his eye while loudly explaining “ma ee – ma ee!” Bing – my light bulb went on and I realized that he was saying, “there is something wrong with my eye”! LOL

Well, there has been something wrong with “ma ees” too, ever since I was young.

When I was a toddler, my father, who suffered from frequent bouts of cold sores, ended up passing the virus, herpes simplex, on to me while he was cuddling me. The virus took up residence in my eyes and I ended up with ulcerated corneas.

I remember being very young and going in for surgery to cauterize (burn off) the ulcers. I can still remember the smell of the rubber mask they put on me for the gas to put me to sleep. I had a patch on my eye and I wasn’t supposed to let any light in. I ended up with a nasty, itchy reaction on my face due to the surgical tape.

Another time, I woke up from a nap with pools of blood in my eyes from blood vessels that had burst for some reason. I remember a horrible episode in the emergency room while nurses held down my arms and legs while they cauterized the blood vessels – without anesthetic!

I continued to have bouts of herpes simplex infections in my eyes requiring lots of eye drops – ooh sting! And there were a few visits to the opthalmologist where my eye would be “frozen” and then a liquid would be used to remove the ulcers.

The subsequent result was that I developed scar tissue on my cornea, over the lens, which caused some vision loss.

I remember the opthalmologist commenting that if I had continued to have frequent infections, I may have become blind in that eye by the time I turned 18. That was NOT good news.

When I was 16, I suddenly developed a different type of infection called iritis, which is an inflammation in iris muscles of the eye. My vision in that eye turned milky white and my pupil took on a figure 8 shape. A subsequent bout of iritis has caused permanent damage to the iris so it does not allow the pupil to respond to light properly.

I tell you all this so that you will understand why I value my eyesight so much!

I love being outdoors. I love the beauty of God’s creation. I love to paint and do handicrafts. I love photography. I love to read. I love to go for country drives. And I love to look at the faces of my loved ones. All of these things depend on vision and that is why I am so glad that I can still see.

I often thank God for my eyesight. I feel closest to God when I am looking at His creation. I have been mightily blessed by the beauty I have seen. Sometimes, it has taken my breath away in amazement; other times, it has made me weep with joy.

This morning, as I was driving my hubby to work, the sun was rising and glowing through the low-lying mist. Shafts of golden light burst through. The trees were in silhouette against a misty golden backdrop. The green winter wheat was covered with a carpet of glistening diamonds. It was both awe inspiring and peaceful at the same time.

And I once again thanked my Heavenly Father for my eyesight.

Take some time to look at the beauty around you and then remember to thank God that you can see it.

Blessings

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Man-eyes

Like many men, my wonderful hubby suffers with a terrible affliction – he has “man-eyes”. Yes, he is a man and he does have eyes, but they don’t work very well in certain situations. Even though he has to wear prescription eye glasses, he can spot a hawk soaring in the sky half a kilometer away, but the poor man can’t see things that are right in front of his nose. His vision seems to be particularly blurry when looking inside cupboards, closets and drawers. If the saying “if it had teeth it would have bitten you” was true, my poor hubby would be bearing a hundred different bite marks on his face and hands. I can’t tell you how many times I have found him standing staring blankly into a cupboard or closet with a very bewildered look on his face. If I want him to find something, I almost have to give him GPS co-ordinates to the object. He sometimes realizes that he is suffering such an episode and he will plaintively call out to me, “Honey, I can’t find …. I must be using my man-eyes”. Poor soul!

Unfortunately, “man-eyes” is an affliction from which much of mankind suffers. I am referring to the spiritual short-sightedness, and indeed, blindness with which most of mankind, whether male or female, child or adult, suffers from. Most people don’t even manage to “see what’s right in front of their noses”, never mind looking deeper into the things beyond this physical world.

 Isa 59:10 We grope for the wall like the blind, and we grope as if we had no eyes. We stumble at noonday as in the night; we are in deserted places like dead men. 

Helen Keller is quoted as saying, “The only thing worse than being blind is having sight but no vision.” I find that in life,  many people “see” without really seeing. And that even if and when they do look, they use “tunnel vision” or walk around “with blinders on”, meaning that they look at things through the filters of ignorance, arrogance, fear, pride, prejudice, selfishness, culture and tradition.

God calls people who choose to not see truth – foolish:

Jer 5:21 Now hear this, O foolish people and without heart; who have eyes and see not; who have ears and hear not;

God is not talking about people who are physically blind and/or deaf; He is talking about those people who see and hear His truth but who refuse to accept, believe and obey it.

Joh 12:37 But though He had done so many miracles before them, yet they did not believe on Him,

Mat 13:13 Therefore I speak to them in parables, because seeing they see not, and hearing they hear not; nor do they understand.

Mat 13:15  for this people’s heart has become gross, and their ears are dull of hearing, and they have closed their eyes, lest at any time they should see with their eyes and hear with their ears and should understand with their heart, and should be converted, and I should heal them.”

God regards such people as fools.

Being a fool is bad enough, but being a fool and thinking oneself knowledgable and then leading others to partake of that foolishness, is a “velly, velly bad thing” in the eyes of God. Being a fool causes not only yourself to stumble but also everyone else who is following you.

Mat 15:14 … They are blind leaders of the blind. And if the blind lead the blind, both shall fall into the ditch.

Rom 2:19,20 and persuading yourselves to be a guide of the blind, a light to those in darkness; an instructor of the foolish, a teacher of babes, who have the form of knowledge and of the truth in the Law.

In the preceding scripture, the apostle Paul is speaking to Jews in Rome (most likely Pharisees) who believe themselves to be holy, righteous and knowledgeable in the scriptures and thus in position to be teaching others less “informed” than they. Notice how Paul says that they had “persuaded” themselves that this was so. In other word, they were practicing self-deception – they were fooling themselves. Paul also described them as having the “form” of knowledge and truth in the law. They may have looked good on the outside, but there was something “rotten in the state of Denmark” (Hamlet) on the inside.

The Pharisees spiritual pride and blindness led them to hypocrisy and sin.

 Joh 9:40, 41  And those of the Pharisees who were with Him heard these words, and said to Him, Are we also blind? Jesus said to them, If you were blind, you would have no sin. But now you say, We see. Therefore your sin remains.

Even Jesus’ disciples suffered the occasional attack of spiritual “man-eyes”.

Mar 8:15 – 28  And He charged them, saying, Take heed! Beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and of the leaven of Herod. And they reasoned among themselves, saying, It is because we have no loaves.  And knowing it, Jesus said to them, Why do you reason that it is because you have no loaves? Do you not yet perceive nor understand? Have you still hardened your heart? Do you have eyes and do not see? Do you have ears and do not hear? And do you not remember?

The disciples had witnessed Jesus multiplying the loaves and fishes yet here they were thinking that he was concerned because they had only brought one loaf of bread with them. (which is not the lesson he was trying to teach them anyways) I wonder if at times, Jesus felt like banging his forehead in frustration? I know that there have been times when I have given my hubby explicit instructions on where to find something and yet he will still stand in front of the cupboard and tell me that he can’t find the item, at which point I ever so “cheerfully” get up, go over and immediately pick up said item. Of course, I would never say “do you have eyes and do not see?????”!!! (well – maybe I have said it once or twice) And then I pray ,”Lord, that his eyes may be opened!”

But seriously, I do pray that my husband’s spiritual eyes, and those of all our loved ones, would be opened so that they would perceive, see and accept God’s truth.

Psa 146:8 the Lord opens the eyes of the blind;

Mat 20:33 They said to Him, Lord, that our eyes may be opened.

Jesus said that he was sent to give new sight to the blind. While he did heal and restore people’s physical blindness, I believe that Jesus was speaking about bringing spiritual light and understanding.

Luk 4:18 “The Spirit of the Lord is on Me; because of this He has anointed Me to proclaim the Gospel to the poor. He has sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim deliverance to the captives, and new sight to the blind, to set at liberty those having been crushed,

Jesus says that we are blessed when we have and use that Godly, spiritual sight.

Mat 13:16 But blessed are your eyes, for they see; and your ears, for they hear.

Luk 10:23 And He turned to His disciples and said privately, Blessed are the eyes which see the things that you see.

If seeing God’s truth brings blessing, why do people choose to remain blind to it?

Joh 12:42, 43 Still, however, even out of the rulers, many did believe on Him. But because of the Pharisees they did not confess, lest they should be put out of the synagogue; for they loved the glory of men more than the glory of God.

People choose to remain blind because they are more concerned about what other people think; they are worried about losing prestige, power, position, influence, and relationships. These worldly things are more important to them than the things of God. They would rather have “man-eyes” than “God-eyes”.

It’s like sitting in a pitch dark room in which you know there is a lamp but you refuse to turn it on – so you just go on sitting in the dark. When you refuse to accept Jesus, who is the Light, you remain in spiritual darkness.

Jesus came to take away our spiritual blindness, our worldly “man-eyes”, and deliver us from spiritual darkness. He came to restore our sight so that we would see the light of God’s love and truth.

Joh 12:44 But Jesus cried out and said, He who believes on Me does not believe on Me but on Him who sent Me.
Joh 12:45 And he who sees Me sees Him who sent Me.
Joh 12:46 I have come as a Light into the world, so that whoever believes on Me should not remain in darkness.

I pray for all those who suffer from worldly “man-eyes”, that the Lord will open the eyes of the blind so that they may join Simeon in joyful confession and say as he did when he saw Jesus at the temple:

Luk 2:30 For my eyes have seen Your Salvation.

Amen!

P.S. – Hubby is getting his eyes checked tomorrow, so maybe there is yet hope for a cure for his “man-eyes”? LOL